Light Throughout The Night Chapter 1: Slammed Shut
Posted:
2023-01-02 At:
5:30 am:
If you've reached this blog post via a search engine or through social media, I'm posting the complete book for free here as blog posts. A summery is located here.
Light Throughout The Night is a complete story with many twists and turns. The only way to feel the essence of the story is to read it from beginning to end.
Even though I'm posting the book as blog posts, the eBook is still available for sale. As a result, please don't post the book elsewhere.
Chapter 1: Slammed Shut
Sometimes a person’s life goes exactly as planned. They’re born. They go to grade school. They graduate. They go to college. They get a good job. They marry a good husband / wife. They have kids. They make plenty of friends in the neighborhood and live a good life.
Glow’s life didn’t start out going exactly as planned. Her early life wasn’t average, nor was it good.
Glow’s mother died a few months after giving birth to her. Glow wasn’t wanted by her father. He was only dating her mother for a couple months before she got pregnant. Six months after her death, he married another woman.
Glow’s father and stepmother put up with her, yet, didn’t throw much care in her direction. From the beginning, Glow was an accident. That’s how she was treated.
Glow’s father didn’t stay in touch with her birthmother’s side of the family. When her father and stepmother visited their own sides of the family, they usually left Glow home. The few times they did take her, she wished they hadn’t.
Their relatives teased Glow mercilessly, often making fun of her name, making tackles, snide comments about her birthmother, while laughing.
None of them cared, not even slightly. Glow was very young. There wasn’t anything she could do. She sat at the table, fuming in anger, with her mouth clamped shut.
The only time her father and stepmother paid attention to Glow was when she got in trouble. They didn’t care if she did things wrong. That didn’t bother them. Neither cared about what she was doing or wasn’t doing. Her parents only became irritated when the trouble she caused interfered with their lives.
During those instances, they released a wrath of hate and disgust towards Glow, rooted from deep within their souls. The depth of their anger and genuine displeasure, ensured Glow kept those memories for her entire life. The punishments following their wraths were harsh. She learnt at an early age, not to mess with their lives, ever, for any reason.
Glow’s most daunting memory was when she was ten. She decided to skip the last day of school. Her father and stepmother were called to her school as a result. They happened to have a social gathering the same night. Both were irate at the fact they had to miss the gathering.
Glow’s parents were cool and calm during the meeting, holding in their anger until they got home. When they got home, Glow’s father and stepmother let their fury loose, getting in Glow’s face, screaming.
“YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING RIGHT! YOU’RE LUCKY YOU HAVE A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD! WE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN RID OF YOU YEARS AGO! YOU’RE NOT NAMED LIKE THE OTHERS! YOU CAN’T GO TO SCHOOL LIKE THE OTHERS! YOU’RE A WASTE OF OUR TIME! ALL YOU DO IS CAUSE US PROBLEMS!”
Their tirade went on for hours, with many curse words included. Once they enter into a rage of anger, Glow doesn’t dare speak back. She slowly backs to the furthest corner of the room, flinching when they get to close, waiting in fear, in tears for their wrath to end.
When her father and stepmother did finally finish yelling, Glow was vanquished to her room for a month. She wasn’t allowed to leave for any reason.
Her stepmother opened Glow’s door to feed her breakfast, sliding the dish along with a drink into the room. She only opened the door wide enough to leave a plate of food. She didn’t want to see Glow. She didn’t want to hear Glow. Later in the evening, Glow’s stepmother collected the plate and glass, while leaving dinner. Neither parents said a word to Glow the whole month.
Glow spent the first few days crying. Typically, when she’s vanquished to her room she sits on the floor, staring at the wall for weeks at a time, withering away with every second that passes.
Glow lived in a rural area of a small city. Occasionally, she opened the window to listen to other kids playing down the street. The sounds were faint, regardless, they usually eased her suffering, every so often adding to her suffering, knowing she couldn’t go outside to play.
The length of her punishments caused Glow to become secluded from others. By the time Glow was let her out of her room, most of her friends found new friends. They weren’t around any longer.
When her parents were home, both expected Glow to stay away from them, and stay quiet. If Glow disturbed them in anyway, she was sent to her room. She didn’t learn much growing up. The little she did learn was from watching others.
Her parents were well known throughout the city. Most of the locals figured Glow wasn’t being treated humanely, yet, simply turned their heads. Eventually, Glow learnt how to do things wrong without getting her parents involved.
Both Glow’s father and stepmother worked full time jobs, while putting their social appearance first, living life almost as if they didn’t have a child.
As Glow grew older, she was expected to follow in her parents footsteps. Glow’s parents tried forcing her to work at a young age and in their same field of employment.
Having Glow work in their same field of employment created a better social appearance and gave them more control. When Glow refused, her parents tried to get her out of the way and out of their house.
Glow wasn’t interested in living their life. She wanted her own life. She wanted options. Glow wanted her own life as much as her parents didn’t want her to have a life. Glow didn’t want their mentality rubbing off on her. Glow feared, if she stuck around, she would become like them.
At a young age Glow walked out.
That day, just as Glow got to the door, she turned to her father and stepmother, saying, “Going forward, there may be plenty of things that cause me problems and misery throughout the rest of my life. Neither of you will ever cause me another second of misery!”
She slammed the door behind her and didn’t look back.
After leaving, Glow felt great. Two people who caused her a great deal of mental anguish, weren’t a part of her life anymore and couldn’t ever hurt her again.
At the same time, Glow knew her life was going to get tough. She didn’t have any money or a place to go. Glow didn’t have many possessions either. The only things she took with her were a few DVD’s and a portable DVD player.
By ninth grade, Glow dropped out of school. She was out late every night, partying, enjoying life. She slept wherever possible, frequently sleeping on the beach. She loved the soft warm feel of the sand. When Glow woke, she took a quick shower via public beach showers.
The beach where she stayed wasn’t well known. Nevertheless, it was a decent place to spend time, located towards the outer boarder of the city, surrounded by a small boardwalk, with a few stores. During peak season, the beach was somewhat crowded. Most of the time, very few beachgoers visited.
While at the beach, Glow tried to keep to herself. In general, people simply smiled as they walked by. Once in a while guys hit on her. Sometimes, a lonely dude wandering the beach who seemed to like Glow tried flirting with her. Other times, a group of guys looking for ladies to join their party tried to entice Glow to join them.
Even though Glow was homeless, she was seeing someone she met at a nightclub a few months after she began living on the streets. His name is Logan. Their relationship wasn’t always steady.
Logan lived on the other side of town and traveled for work. His travels often kept them apart for weeks at a time. Regardless, she liked him and wasn’t looking to meet anyone else. When someone hit on her, she brushed them off without a second thought.
Every now and then, workers patrolling the beach, who saw Glow regularly, question her. If Glow felt the questions were too intrusive, she changed her routine. She took local train or bus rides when she got tired.
After boarding, Glow found an empty seat in a vacant section. She turned her head as if she was looking out the window, before passing out. A couple hours later, she woke to exit when the train or bus reached the last stop. From there, she boarded the next train or bus, repeatedly, until she got enough rest.
Once in a while, Glow stayed at friends’ houses. She was best friends with a chick named Becky. She mostly stayed at Beckie’s house. Regardless of the friend, or how much she enjoyed their company, Glow was always very considerate, never staying more than a couple days.
Despite the fact Glow didn’t have a place to sleep, she wasn’t completely broke. Occasionally, she worked odd jobs. Without having to pay rent, she stretched even a small paycheck for at least a month.
Many people didn’t realize she was living on the streets. Others didn’t care. After seeing Glow on the streets, they went home, ate dinner, before going sleep, without giving Glow a second thought.
Every so often, Glow gathered a little extra cash. With the money she gathered, she purchased cross country, round trip bus tickets. Long distance bus trips were an inexpensive way for her to catch up on sleep. The bus trips took about two weeks and were mostly via highway.
Glow slept during the majority of the ride. When she wasn’t sleeping, she looked out the window. Sometimes she daydreamed. Sometimes she felt sorry for herself. Other times, she just enjoyed the scenery.
The buses stopped at different cities for layovers. The longer layovers were between five and six hours. Glow usually exited the bus to stretch her legs, while walking the city’s streets.
While traveling across the country, Glow spoke with plenty of different people. Typically, she kept the conversations to small talk. She was often asked the usual questions. “Where are you going?” “Where are you from?” Glow didn’t always have a good answer.
She tried telling the truth a few times. “I just felt like hopping on the bus to view the scenery and catch up on sleep.” After a few bewildered looks, she just shrugged when asked those types of questions.
Occasionally, Glow introduced herself. Frequently, she received complements due to the uniqueness of her name. The complements were almost always followed up with questions asking about her name. How and why Glow’s birthmother named Glow, is one of the few highlights she remembers from her early childhood.
When asked about her name, Glow’s eyes brightened. They grew wide, sparkling, followed by a smile, a smile bright enough to light up an entire room. Immediately thereafter, she told them the story about her name. She loves telling that story.
When Glow was very young, her aunt (her birthmothers sister) told Glow why she was named Glow. Even at a very young age, Glow remembers the story like it was told to her yesterday.
Her natural birthmother was a professional wrestler for an independent wrestling circuit. After she got pregnant, she stayed with the circuit to train rookie female wrestlers.
Shortly before Glow’s birth, her mom flew to Las Vegas for a wrestling event. While in Las Vegas, she found out the G.L.O.W. Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling were filming their 100th episode at the Riviera Hotel.
The Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling were the reason her birthmother became a professional wrestler. With the success of G.L.O.W., her wrestling circuit added females to their wrestling events.
Glow’s mom was staying at a hotel a couple blocks away. Even at eight and a half months pregnant, after working eight hours, in the dark, by herself, and with swollen feet, Glow’s mom decided to take a walk down the street to see the Riviera Hotel.
Neon signs lit up the whole street. When she arrived in front of the Riviera Hotel, a huge neon sign illuminated the sky, displaying the acronym G.L.O.W.. The very second Glow’s mom looked up at the sign, she went into labor. She knew at that instant, she was naming her daughter Glow.
When Glow wasn’t taking bus trips, the few things she owned, she kept in lockers. Lockers were available at the beach to rent by the week. Whenever possible, she stored her stuff in those lockers.
Other times, Glow stored her stuff inside gym lockers. Often, workers who saw Glow visiting regularly, bent the rules, allowing Glow to keep her lock on a locker. Gyms were another place where she showered.
Sometimes, Glow stayed at her boyfriend’s house, often cuddling with him in front of the tv. Logan didn’t know she was living on the streets when they weren’t together. Neither asked the other many questions.
Most of the time they spent together was a rush, enjoying the glory of parties and clubs, enjoying being young, carefree, enjoying each other’s company and simply enjoying life. That’s all Glow ever wanted, someone to enjoy life with.
Nevertheless, their time together always ended. Without fail, every few weeks, Logan was scheduled to travel for work, causing Glow anguish. She didn’t like when their time together ended. Glow viewed Logan’s business trips as a sign he didn’t want to spend as much time with her as she did with him.
While they were apart Glow thought about Logan. She wondered if he met other ladies during his travels. She worried he might not come back. Though, when he did, things were like he never left. Glow and Logan always clicked when they were together.
Eventually, Logan started taking longer trips. The two did have differences. Logan was raised in much the same way many others are raised. He spent a lot of time with his family. He was very proper.
Glow was the opposite. She always declined when Logan invited her to have dinner with his family. The only thing she knew about family was the way she was treated. She didn’t want anything to do with that.
Over time, Logan decided he wanted something different, something better, at least in his mind. Glow was ecstatic just to have the basic necessities and ecstatic they were enjoying life together.
In many ways, Glow and Logan didn’t understand each other. Just like Glow couldn’t understand why he liked spending time with his family, Logan couldn’t understand why she didn’t have his same ambition.
As Logan’s trips got longer, the two stopped clicking the same way they did earlier in their relationship. The good times weren’t as good. With his travels, his interests changed. Logan began keeping his distance, even when he wasn’t traveling.
The couple stopped staying in touch and seeing each other all together.
Glow was 22 years old. Logan was the only guy she ever dated. While the two were out together at clubs, she was fiercely possessive of him. Glow’s mentality caused her to get into a few scuffles if other ladies crept to close.
After their breakup, Glow went through difficult times. Her life spiraled into a downward disaster. Most would think, just the fact she was living on the street was the bottom rung. It wasn’t. Glow withdrew herself from society. She was angry all the time. She lost interest in anything and everything going on in the world.
Whenever Glow earned money, she bought alcohol, while spending the majority of her time alone, drunk and broke. She often reflected on her life. She felt sorry for herself and in many ways her feelings were justified.
After leaving multiple jobs, Glow couldn’t even afford alcohol. Life on the street became much tougher. Her best friend Beckie moved away for college. She didn’t have any way to escape the streets.
Glow didn’t make things easier for herself either. She refused to ask anyone for money. Workers began interrogating her when they saw her at the beach or on trains.
Finding places to sleep became much more difficult. Some days Glow walked miles, in direct sunlight, searching for a place to sleep. Hours later, bewildered, dehydrated and exhausted, she passed out wherever she was located, usually a sidewalk.
When someone woke Glow, she simply apologized, saying she just needed a rest, then, walked as far as she could before passing out on some other sidewalk.
Glow rarely ate. Most days she scavenged a few bites here and there. Some stores gave out free samples. She ate as many of those as allowed. Needless to say, her hunger wasn’t satisfied.
After days only eating morsels, pain from the emptiness in her stomach increased substantially. After a few weeks, the pain subsided slightly. Glow’s body adapted to less food. She lost a significant amount of weight.
Her stomach sunk inward, tightly stretching her skin over her ribs, exposing the bones in her ribs, before curving into an almost nonexistent mid-section.
Malnourishment took its toll. Her muscles became weak and frail. Dehydration also took its toll. Glow was drenched in sweat all day, she couldn’t drink nearly as much as her body needed. Dehydration, combined with malnourishment, beats down the toughest people. In order to walk, Glow needed to use all her strength just to lift each leg up and forward.
After many very brutal months on the street, Glow began to pull herself together. She learnt different methods to stay out of the limelight and sunlight, while still staying out of societies grasp.
She cleaned herself up somewhat. Then, found a part time job. After working a few months, she purchased a used pickup truck.
Before Glow found a job, her thoughts were of immediate necessities for survival. She usually spent hours trying to figure out where she could find her next meal. Then, where she could sleep later at night. Working and having the pickup relived some of those issues, at least to a lesser degree.
Glow spent the next year and a half of her life on the streets, going from part time job to part time job. At the same time, Glow began spending time at libraries, reading books, thinking about things other than immediate survival.
Glow discovered different, interesting parts of life. Yet, she still couldn’t find her niche. She couldn’t find another guy she liked, and she couldn’t find another group of friends. Eventually, she couldn’t find another job.
Today, Glow sits in her pickup. Thoughts, quickly pass through her head as she tries to figure out how to find peace within herself.
Keywords: Light Throughout The Night, Chapter 1, Slammed Shut, Glow, Child Abuse, Neglect, Runaway, Yelling, Punished, G.L.O.W. Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling, Riviera Hotel, Peace Within, Fiction Book, LTTN
Category: Light Throughout The Night Book
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